2024mar03. No cogitation time spent last week on my confirmation bias, but today I thought, "I have been watched throughout my life." Even to the extent of being told that god watches me every second, which I quickly doubted in early elementary school never to return to 'belief', and there is no god's will, only some human authority figure who promotes a paradigm to get THEIR way, not necessarily my way, my life-way, you know, the thing that THEY call free will.
So, after 86 years, I still strive for freeing in my pie-of-life -- that's my world environment fenced by all the human feelings/emotions, that is, polarities joy-sad, love-hate, freeing-fear. Each of us uses our will to choose toward those polarities or anywhere in between where we can satisfice.
Recently, I have navigated through a partial withdrawal from COA. As my personal blog HarvOtto.com stated:
- 2024 week 10: "Mend a lifeway without COA 'retirement office' and no member wifi."
- 24 week 09: "Grieve COA 'retirement office' death, to be replaced by ?"
- 24 week 08: "COA too much a downer, specifically good wifi withheld from members."
- 24 week 07: "The joy of a clear calendar week ahead !" "What to do with it ?"
Call the above "Harv's COA Computing Activity withdrawal lifeway phase." There was also a "COA introduction phase" and a myriad of other lifeway phases in a lifetime.
As his lifeway years has progressed, Harv attempted to chart his weekly journal results over his lifetime. The result was an understanding of the epochs of his lifetime. Observe that chase was his fatal fault -- too much time chasing in micro and macro views. In hindsight, he chased love from his baby phase onward.
- resolution for y84: SELF spirit-development responsibility 5 years of SELF-spirit-responsibility LIFE-EPOCH-FOUR below and continued above Starkly compare the above next year’s actualization as it happens. CKD to ESRD TERMINAL ? (see week 12 GFR reversal)
- conscious SELF-spirit-development reconstitution concerted SELF-spirit-responsibility begins 22 years of family chase LIFE-EPOCH-THREE below
- family chase begins to assist in SELF-spirit-reconstitution continued self-spirit-development 35 years life-partnership-chase LIFE-EPOCH-TWO below
- life-partnership chase begins resulting in damping of SELF-spirit-development 22 years of H2o-self-spirit-development LIFE-EPOCH-ONE below
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Figure -- six EPOCHS of 91 years 1938-2029 ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
- 6 -- SELF COMPLETES ... then disappears 5 years continued SELF-spirit-responsibility "I experience joy-love-freeing via a wholistic self of respect, encouragement, challenge."
- 5 -- 2 years to arrive at wholistic SELF "compare the above next year’s actualization as it happens." CKD to ESRD TERMINUS DID NOT HAPPEN with enough intervened growth lifetime to provide statistical confidence for statistical longevity of 91y.
- 5 years of SELF-spirit-responsibility LIFE-EPOCH-FOUR prior and post. Starkly compare the next year’s actualization as it happens. CKD to ESRD TERMINAL ?
- 22 years of family chase LIFE-EPOCH-THREE
- 35 years life-partnership-chase LIFE-EPOCH-TWO
- 22 years of H2o-self-spirit-development LIFE-EPOCH-ONE 1938 December 01 Harv born a bastard weeks after parents’ marriage of Connie’s-temper and Senior’s drink but he never danced 1938 shotgun wedding: city-view v farm-view argued abortion (Connie delayed abortion until 2003 — son Harv’s y63 ultimate 'hard" eviction)
Source: Autotelic LifeFlow (ALF) chart with 86 years of weekly detail via Scrivener app.
Another more recent attempt at seeing his lifeway throughout his lifetime is his fourteen scenes of his Me-Self (Whatever happened to MrFixIt?).
2024mar. ME-SELF lifetime history scenes: :: -2029- statistical DEATH y91 as weekly growth-hours dwindle "a PERFECT LIFE"(H2o) :: -2024- blog/tome unlimited internet world-web instant publishing :: -2022- nixed world cruise at $8000 loss to seriously fight CKD-ESRD death GFR plummet arrested -2024 - with plant based diet :: -2020 - settled in Four Townes FL with COA 'office' :: -2018- with walker and annual pass walked Disney World daily adapting post CA -2017- ends LIFE BICYCLES, tricycle remains in CA :: -2016- cancers -- prostate, scalp -- NC connection ends :: -200x- seriousness of seven web-sites write-publish anti-no-talk, gain CA/FL ties PERSONAL GROWTH study :: INTERGENERATIONAL RETIRE TIME -2022+- Four Townes -2017- CA -2015+- NC -2012+- Baldwin -2001+ Williamsburg -2000+- Tampa -1998+- OH -1996+- KS -1995- MO -1960s+- WI :: -1998- ended SPORTS CAREER :: -1996- PhD almost a life-partner :: -1992- Germany Swabia Spain :: -1990- retired without realizing :: -1989-1985- EDUCATION CAREER :: -1984- noted no-talk err*(s) :: -1980- CMA personal computer taken on consulting job (also bowling ball) :: 1982-1961- MBA per (B.Dunn) 'a PERFECT MARRIAGE' three 3-week-including weekends vacations INDUSTRY CAREER :: voluntary 4F -1960- BSME correct too-easy calculus exam solution insecurely crossed out , walked to college.
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2024feb28. In the 2023feb period of personal upheaval, that is, the realization that COA wifi was no longer available to members as was cleared in 2023 with the OC COA activities administrator in consultation with a visit from director Heather, Harv's challenge is to recoup personally and cooperatively going forward within the new activities policy of no Computing Activity which was in existence in 2023 evidenced by Orange City Council On Aging sign-in daily log sheets.
2023 COA Computing Activity defined. First, the computers that are familiar, some however faintly, with the people of COA -- smart phones, tablets, iPads, laptops, desktops (used in COA classes a half dozen years ago when the wifi password was "PUBLIC"). Computing on (using) the listed equipment is then the using of these computers and their apps by the members. Computing Activity in turn, is an activity within the COA activity framework, that is, a sign-up sheet, material needed, and floor space as mainly experienced in 2023 when COA Wava Hall wifi was made available to members by administration. In sum then, under Computing Activity there were (1) computers, (2) their use (computing), and (3) the COA supported Computing Activity. NOTE WELL -- computer classes, whatever the form bantered about by whoever, were never a part of the 2023 Computing Activity that is now defunct by cancelling wifi support in 2024.
2024feb13. Harv's unique lifeway from definitely before 2020JUL17 initial blog page
For Harv, his uniqueness encourages his expression of that uniqueness -- a personal joy. Through his expression, not only could another heed his example -- or avoid his example -- but most importantly in his own self-interest, he uses his expression to encourage, and even challenge his own further action choice, thus renewing his me-self in the spirit of betterment. This is his lifeway -- unique.
A portion of the individual variation in sensory systems is innate. But those innate effects are elaborated and magnified with time as we accumulate [choose] experiences, expectations, and memories, filtered through and in turn modifying those … sensory systems. In this way, the interacting forces of heredity, experience, plasticity, and development resonate to make us unique."Unique: The new science of Human Individuality" (p254), Linden 2020.
Yet life is made from only a few ingredients.
Although organisms differ wildly in appearance, they are made from the same basic chemical building blocks, called primary metabolites, which are directly involved in cell growth and development. Examples include amino acids that help build proteins and nucleotides that make up RNA and DNA. https://www.washingtonpost.com/climate-environment/2024/02/29/life-earth-origin-chemistry/?utm_campaign=wp_evening_edition&utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter&carta-url=https%3A%2F%2Fs2.washingtonpost.com%2Fcar-ln-tr%2F3cea142%2F65e0fe7559014369ad1c5ecf%2F598b051fae7e8a68162a1429%2F23%2F49%2F65e0fe7559014369ad1c5ecf
So too with Harv's life, but he focuses not on those chemical elements, but on the time element -- specifically a meaningful period of time that can be used as a tool for the manipulation of longevity, productivity, emotional/feelings stability, ... Those elements are wholly hors in packets of weeks.
Thus, over a period of 86 years, Harv can understand five epochs of his life.
Or, in 2024, he can understand the challenges of lifeway change from COA Computing Activity to just COA daily dining. A three week transition reaction to external sociality. A reasonable lifeway adjustment means a continued better grasp on the niceties of joy-love-freeing rather than the negatives of sad-hate-fear. He simply moves on in time to more positive personal experience.
- 24 week 10: "Mend a lifeway without COA 'retirement office' and no member wifi."
- 24 week 09: "Grieve COA 'retirement office' death, to be replaced by ?"
- 24 week 08: "COA too much a downer, specifically good wifi withheld from members."
- 24 week 07: "The joy of a clear calendar week ahead !" "What to do with it ?"
And, he feels death -- comfort, peace, vivid greenery, cool wafts, non-inflamed ankles as a measure of health, and too much eats brings one back to food comfort.
Many factors promote his expression.
His accumulated wealth -- enough. His income stream -- stable and secure in retirement. His expression -- getting better. His life-work 'office' -- COA Orange City Florida -- he officially lost 2024 COA Orange City wifi since they no longer provide wifi for member use. Fortunate for Harv, he had attained adequate wifi connection via his own router at his 'home'. What an improvement since Juno dial up of decades ago -- finally, enough. His 'home' remains his car.. He has lived out of his vehicle "by choice" on/off for decades. In 2023 he found reliable mechanic support -- thus, enough. Statistically his longevity projection is y91 -- enough. But never enough life time to makeup for the procrastination in his life.
To write in his car-office will probably see him to his inevitable death as a 91yo in his car as his son once projected. Mother Connie lived into her 102nd year so there may be some more lifetime made available.
Overarching, his lifeway is betterment, now propelled by daily instant web publishing thanks to Google's free Blogger software.
His life style is loner -- that modern day hermit -- he is "rich" living out of his car, leveraging the advantage of the ultimate flexibility of his as-set actions.
He publishes instantly -- achieved 2024 with an audience of one -- himself. He turns the wheel of intellectual interest at will by 1) news curation first via subscribed news letters 2) his sociality messaging 3) second an ordered scanning of his listed news outlet websites 4) noting and publishing thoughts of interest affecting and expressing his world view 5) using the notes to narrate his tome -- his hobby if you will. The 'hobby' that keeps himself 'sane' and on the betterment lifeway.
What then of his spirit principles?
If Harv's tome is his hobby, how about whimsical being his lifeway state of mind? WHIMSICAL (thesaurus): adjective: 1 a whimsical sense of humor. fanciful, playful, mischievous, waggish, quaint, fantastic, unusual, curious, droll; eccentric, quirky, offbeat, idiosyncratic, unconventional, outlandish, peculiar, bizarre, weird, odd, freakish; informal freaky. 2 the whimsical arbitrariness of autocracy. volatile, capricious, temperamental, impulsive, excitable, fickle, changeable, unpredictable, variable, erratic, quicksilver, mercurial, mutable, inconstant, inconsistent, unstable, unsteady, fluctuating, ever-changing, protean, kaleidoscopic, fluid, wavering, vacillating, wayward; technical labile. WHIMSICAL (dictionary): adjective; 1 playfully quaint or fanciful, especially in an appealing and amusing way: a whimsical sense of humor. 2 acting or behaving in a capricious manner: the whimsical arbitrariness of autocracy. CAPRICIOUS: adjective: given to sudden and unaccountable changes of mood or behavior.
Harv desires not to be capricious, thus optimizing the effectiveness of his JLF remaining lifetime. He desires not to pursue, for example, another chase epoch (like epochs two and three below).
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Figure -- five EPOCHS of 86 years 1938-2024 ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
- continued SELF-spirit-responsibility LIFE-EPOCH-SIX -- SELF COMPLETES then disappears. "I experience joy-love-freeing via a wholistic self of respect, encouragement, challenge."
- 2 years to arrive at wholistic SELF for LIFE-EPOCH-FIVE. "Starkly compare the above next year’s actualization as it happens."
- CKD to ESRD TERMINUS DID NOT HAPPEN with enough intervened growth lifetime to provide statistical confidence for statistical longevity of 91y.
- 5 years of SELF-spirit-responsibility LIFE-EPOCH-FOUR prior and post. Starkly compare the next year’s actualization as it happens. CKD to ESRD TERMINAL ?
- 22 years of family chase LIFE-EPOCH-THREE
- 35 years life-partnership-chase LIFE-EPOCH-TWO
- 22 years of H2o-self-spirit-development LIFE-EPOCH-ONE
- 1938 December 01 Harv born a bastard weeks after parents’ marriage of Connie’s-temper and Senior’s drink but he never danced
- 1938 shotgun wedding: city-view v farm-view argued abortion (Connie delayed abortion until 2003 — son Harv’s y63 ultimate 'hard" eviction)
Source: Autotelic LifeFlow (ALF) chart with 86 years of weekly detail via Scrivener app.
Harv adds that his choices precede the weekly report of experiences that plasticize
his expectations.
Harv is the Point of Choice (POC) in his personal world. Designating his world as a pie,
his self as the POC navigates the pie which has four poles of feelings/emotions: joy-sad,
love-hate, and the circumference of the pie as freeing-fear where freeing expands his
world’s circumference, roughly called growth. He deems the joy-love-freeing feelings
as positive, and sad-hate-fear as negatives to be avoided.
This lifeway study, analogous to a job description in the job world, continues the academic work of his PhD dissertation "Functional Organization: Theory W unifies strategy, functionalism, productivity, and structure for members and the individual".
His self observation and associated study gave him these impressions/expressions. What then did other peoples have to say about life-ways -- the Bible people, or the Hindu people for example? A: the Spirit Principles and Self-Realization readings.. Or, from Wayne Dyers perspective? A: his trilogy. Or, from the perspective of Functional Organization,
more on Harv’s 82 year lifeway 3034feb29
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PhD in Functional Organization
Harv’s PhD is out there in the Cloud somewhere, some linked here. He continues PhD work via lifetime
case study. The blog/tome web sites phase of that study is an addendum to that dissertation.
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Personal struggle:
Harv is a maverick for want of a better term. In his late teens, he ran a bowling pin team and was knighted by them with the nickname of “Happy Harv.” The initials H2o were painted on his bowling bag and stamped into his bowling ball as short for “Happy Harv Otto.” The “water ball” has a humorous connotation among bowlers.
Daughter Susan tagged him as a “lone wolf.” Son Chris has him as an “Urban Outdoor’s Person,” the son sees Dad as dying in Harv’s car, his “Residence In Motion (RIM).” However, Harv lives out of his RIM by choice. Several singles’ marketplace ladies wrote him off as a minimalist. He also studies printed
matter about hermits.
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Validly of a life’s history
In July 2020, Harv has visualized Blogger as an instrument to communicate tidbits and sums of life phases that input Harv’s future happiness.